Soul4you · Georgina Kovacs · The Birth of Choice series, Article 4b · Estimated reading time: 6 minutes
This is a companion piece to my article on Joseph’s forgiveness. There, we explored the inner shift that happens when a grievance loses its power and no longer determines how we relate to another person.
Here, I begin with a different question arising from Joseph’s story: how does a person’s inner world change, and what can happen in their relationships when the old image others hold of them no longer reflects who they have become? I want to explore this first, before turning to Jesus’ appearances after the resurrection, where my focus shifts to the relationship between presence and bodily form.
I do not place these two stories side by side because the same thing happens to Joseph and Jesus. In Jesus’ appearances, I explore the possibility that the one who stands before us may not be bound to his visible form in the same way that we feel bound to our bodies. To me, these scenes suggest that presence may be more than the form through which we perceive it.
Joseph: a familiar face, a changed person
Joseph recognizes his brothers, but they do not recognize him; he stands before them as a ruler in Egypt, with an interpreter between them (Genesis 42:6–8, 23, NABRE). I also read this moment as an image of inner change: someone we once knew stands before us, but our memories are no longer enough to help us understand the person who is here now.
When someone undertakes inner work on a spiritual path, seeking to understand themselves and shape their life around what they discover, the first changes are not necessarily visible from the outside. What they value, what they believe to be true, and the thinking behind their decisions may all change. A question may arise where there was once an answer they took for granted. Something they once wanted to hold on to at any cost may no longer serve their life.
As we do this inner work, we also shed some of our old roles. They can be like a coat that once belonged to us but no longer fits. We do not simply change how we behave in particular situations: what matters to us, how we understand ourselves, and the life we want to live may change as well.
Over time, new roles bring new responses, different decisions, and different ways of connecting with others. Through these changes, the person we are becoming takes shape. There may be little visible difference, yet inwardly we no longer begin from the same thoughts and expectations. Anyone still looking for us in that old coat will need to get to know the person who stands before them now.
When the same words no longer mean the same thing
Inner change can also make itself felt in conversation. We may use the same word yet mean different things by it: love no longer means accommodating others without question, acceptance is not resignation, and responsibility does not mean taking everything upon ourselves.
The understanding we once shared may then begin to falter. The other person may expect a familiar answer, but we can no longer give it. Not necessarily because we are rejecting them. We may simply see the subject differently, without yet having a shared language for what has changed.
Those around us may perceive this in different ways. One person sees us as more open; another finds us more distant. What feels like honesty from within may look like an unfamiliar boundary from the outside. Leaving an old role behind changes things not only for us, but also for anyone who used to relate to us through that role.
If we no longer understand each other as we once did, we may have changed in different directions, with different questions becoming important to us. At that point, the question is not how far either of us has come, but whether we can find common ground again. Sometimes we do, given time; at other times, we quietly grow apart. Yet the value of the time we shared is not erased if we later relate to each other differently, or if we never meet again.
This, too, can be part of change: letting go of the expectation that everyone will see us as we now see ourselves. And noticing that we, too, may be holding on to images of other people that they have since outgrown.
Jesus: presence and visible form
Jesus’ appearances after the resurrection raise a different question: the closing section of Mark’s Gospel describes him appearing “in another form,” while John recounts his appearance among the disciples even though the doors were locked (Mark 16:12, NABRE; John 20:19, 26, NABRE). In Luke’s account, he also invites them to touch him and eats in front of them (Luke 24:39–43, NABRE).
What draws me to these scenes is the freedom they suggest: the possibility that the one who appears is not bound to bodily form in the same way that we feel ourselves to be. He becomes visible and enters into relationship with others, yet his appearances do not conform to what our everyday experience would lead us to expect.
In my reading, these scenes suggest that a higher spiritual presence may take a perceptible form. From this perspective, the body does not entirely determine who can be present or how. Form makes an encounter possible, but does not necessarily limit the one who appears through it.
For me, then, “another form” is not simply a matter of a changed outward appearance. It invites me not to assume that the familiar appearance and the one who is present are one and the same. Can we think of existence in a way that allows form to be one way of becoming perceptible, rather than a fixed constraint?
Mary Magdalene does not recognize Jesus at first; then, when Jesus calls her by name, she responds, “Rabbouni,” meaning Teacher (John 20:14–16, NABRE). What matters to me in this scene is the personal nature of the encounter: looking for a familiar form is not enough for recognition; being called by name opens the way to connection.
With Joseph, I am speaking about a person’s inner transformation. With Jesus, I am exploring the possibility that presence is more than visible form. These are not the same.
Yet both invite me not to regard what I see at first glance as the whole picture. Knowing a person does not end with recognizing their face, and encountering a presence in visible form does not necessarily mean that I understand everything about it.
With love,
Georgina
Soul4you
Sources
Biblical quotations and references follow the New American Bible, Revised Edition (NABRE), as published on the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops’ website. The spiritual interpretation of these passages is the author’s own reading.
Genesis 42:6–8, 23: Joseph’s position as governor, his brothers’ failure to recognize him, and the presence of an interpreter. NABRE, Genesis 42.
Mark 16:12: Jesus appearing “in another form.” NABRE, Mark 16.
John 20:14–16, 19, 26: Mary Magdalene’s recognition of Jesus and his appearances despite the locked doors. NABRE, John 20.
Luke 24:39–43: Jesus inviting the disciples to touch him and eating in front of them. NABRE, Luke 24.